Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Boost Your Self Esteem

Having high self-esteem and high self worth is the basis for a happy, productive and well balanced life. Poor self-esteem, on the other hand, tends to lead to an unfulfilling and unhappy life where you will fall well short of your potential.

So how do you increase your self-esteem?

There are three areas that you need to consider with regard to boosting your se13CDlf-esteem. These are Your relationship with yourself, Your relationship to other people, and Your habits.

Your Relationship With Yourself
Our sense of self-worth and self-esteem may have been moulded and formed by experiences in our childhood, but it is how we regard ourselves today that perpetuates the vicious circle.

To boost your self-esteem you need to appreciate yourself more. Be aware when you do something well and congratulate yourself. Look back over your life time and list all the things you have done successfully there are hundreds of things if you just look for them. To start you off: perhaps you have successfully learned to talk your native language; you have successfully learned to walk, and run and jump; you have successfully learned to tie your shoelaces; you dared to ask someone out on a date. The list is endless. If you write all these successes down then that list becomes a resource to boost your self-esteem by re-reading it and adding to it every day.

Become your own best friend and champion. Watch what you say to yourself and make sure that you always use supportive, kind and positive language. Even when you make mistakes and things go wrong, you can tell yourself that you tried your best, you did what you thought was right at the time, you are still a good person. Too many people spend most of their self-talk being thoroughly unkind and nasty to themselves and undermining and lowering their self-esteem.

Your Relationship To Other People
Each day we interact with other people and their reactions to us can cause us to feel better, or worse, about ourselves. This can undermine our self-esteem, or it can help to build it up. There are several actions you can take to boost your self-esteem in relation to other people.

Most of us will have received compliments, good wishes, perhaps good school reports, at some time in our lives. Collect all the nice things that anyone else has ever said about you and write them down. Keep a note of all the kind and generous things other people have done for you. As you do this you will realise that other people do like you and appreciate you because you are OK.

Remind yourself daily what you love about your close family and friends. As you focus on what is good in these relationships that good will grow and any niggling dissatisfactions will fade into the background. You'll be happier and you will feel better about yourself.

When people appear to be unkind or unjust to you, realise that the other person is always doing the best they know how in their own life situation. If they put you down it is because they lack self-esteem it's got nothing to do with you.

Develop new habits
One of the ways we tend to maintain our level of self-esteem is through our daily habits. If your habits are undermining your self-esteem, change them for supportive habits that will build you up and encourage you.

Set small goals that you can achieve fairly easily and then appreciate yourself when you achieve them.

Take a brisk walk or a bike ride and make sure you breathe deeply of good fresh air. It's not only good for your physical health but it lifts your spirits and makes you feel better about yourself.

Create and read positive affirmations about yourself and your life. Read inspiring books, particularly biographies of great people.

Create a list each evening of the things you are grateful for that day. And feel gratitude for them. As you feel gratitude for what you have your self-esteem grows and your spirits lift. Happy people have much higher self-esteem than unhappy people.

Smile at a stranger, maybe even speak to a stranger. Cheer someone else up and you will feel better about yourself.

If you will incorporate just a few of these new behaviours into your life each day you will find your self-esteem increasing and you will start to feel much better about yourself.

Penny Dablin is a life coach and the author of How To Feel Great, Find Love and Get Promoted: 50 Ways To Boost Your Self-Esteem
For many more ideas and ways to build your self-esteem check out the website at http://www.buildyourselfesteem.co.uk

Spiritual Advice


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